....StripXpertease.... The Strip and the Tease.

Sexuality, tips and toys, the good and bad of being a stripper, insight into Kimberly's life, men, StripXpertease info, tales of dancing from the past, and experiences teaching women's striptease and lap dance classes in NY & NJ.
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Sunday, July 12, 2009

Another day in the life of a stripper interview..and my 2 cents

Diablo Cody, before the big time.


Brook Busey-Hunt seemed to have it all. A college degree. Two loving parents. A job at an advertising agency and a supportive boyfriend.
So how in the world did she end up on the stripping pole?
In her words, boredom. Lol...yeah, isn't that why we all turn to stripping? She was 24. With her Catholic upbringing, she had never been on a motorcycle, gotten pregnant or thrown a drink in someone's face.
She was a drag.
So on a whim, Busey-Hunt decided to sign up for amateur night at a strip joint in Minneapolis. While she didn't win, she was seduced by an adrenaline rush she had never felt before. She continued to strip, eventually giving up her day job at an advertising agency to strip full-time.
"I think that for some people just doing the amateur night was enough to fill their curiosity," says Busey-Hunt, who writes under the name Diablo Cody. She grew up in Chicago and moved to Minneapolis for a man she met on the Internet and later married. "I became addicted. It was liberating for me."
Busey-Hunt, now 27 and a TV critic at an alternative weekly in Minneapolis, recounts her year dancing on the pole in "Candy Girl: A Year in the Life of an Unlikely Stripper" (Gotham, $24).
The book chronicles her adventures in the sex industry, with such intimate details as why clubs are kept cold (customers like it when strippers huddle together)I feel it's because sweaty guys are stinky and hard nipples look good. But yeah, WTF? Always SO COLD! I think it is because we were all half naked. and why strippers who wear white make more money (good girls wear white).
"There are a lot of books that go into the melancholy of stripping," says Busey-Hunt. "I wanted to write almost a traveling guide, where people could read it and almost have fun in the adventure."
Still, in the end, she thought stripping devalued women. She answered a few questions to explain how her walk on the wild side turned into its own kind of drag.

Q: Sounds like this was more about rebellion than needing the money.
A: It was definitely rebellion. It was a huge adrenalie rush because I wasn't accustomed to it. I think more people tend to get addicted to the money and freedom as opposed to the sheer rebellion of the act. I feel it was both for me. I never did well with the white-collar, 9-to-5 profession. I was in a career downward spiral when I was at an age I should (have been) advancing. I was able to ... do something fun.

Q: I have always wanted to know this. Do women really become strippers to put themselves through medical school?
A: No, I think that's a common misconception. It's a fantasy perpetuated by a lot of strippers. I met very few girls who were actually using the money to further their education. They were using it to survive. Sad, but true.
Q: Were any of them hoping this would help them launch a singing, dancing or acting career?
A: Most of the girls were pretty jaded and not that starry-eyed. I think they knew that kind of dream was impossible. The biggest dream was to meet a rich guy and get out of the business. That happened once in a blue moon. True. I think you live in the moment there, I don't remember thinking about the future a lot. That was probably my biggest problem.
Q: Do strippers sleep with the customers?
A: It's not terribly common, but it does happen at every club. You might want to convince men it may happen to lure them into the VIP room. I only know a handful of girls who were actually prostitutes inside the club. Yep, just make them think that juuuuuussst maybe you will.
Q: You say you failed as a stripper. How do you measure success?
A: I was always a pretty low earner. I was never able to propel myself into the upper echelon. I am not a natural-born stripper. I am a geek. I think there are women who have this amazing innate geisha, where they can talk to men and make them feel like pampered creatures. I think a lot of times my personality was challenging to men.
Q: What happened on the day you decided to stop stripping?
A: There were 10 or 15 girls working, and they were going around asking, "Do you want to dance? Do you want to dance?" It seemed so sad. It was a miserable scene. I thought to myself, "I don't want to be a part of this, where we're almost robotic." I saw the power struggle right there in front of my eyes. It's really my essential problem with the entire sex indutry. Women are not appreciated as much as they should be. Women are really treated like meat. Wow. Yep.

HER CUSTOMERS:"Most of them were married or total loners who had a lot of difficulty getting dates. I think they were there because they were disempowered in regular life. Going to a strip club enables them to get some of that power back." Yep.
MOST SHE EVER MADE: $800 in a night, which was low, considering some women brought in $3,000 to $4,000. I don't remember the most I ever made, but it was never over 2k.
BIGGEST SURPRISE: "I think stripping often gets portrayed as a glamourous profession. People look at strippers as being pampered and making thousands of dollars. When you get to see it from an insider's angle, it becomes apparent it's hard work. It was some of the hardest work I have ever done." Amen!

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Wednesday, January 21, 2009

It's been a while

Well... I've been busy!
I've been wanting to post and tell you so many things!
But I'll start with this. I recently ...well, 2 months ago, had a lady contact me. She wanted to take weekly classes to learn how to be an exotic dancer. My first reaction was please let me discourage you. The business will take so much out of you. It will make you hate yourself. Don't do it! I get a lot of calls .. girls wanting to dance. I tell them the truth, what it did to me. How all of the girls I know who are retired feel the same way. Also, we don't teach aspiring dancers. It is a different skill set, different moves. Our clients are dancing for their loved ones so they can touch, they don't have to have a fake name, they don't need to know how to sell how to figure out what the client likes in order to sell more. Its much easier!
Anyway, she got very upset. She said she was a former cop , she was writing a book, which she said she wasn't even supposed to tell me about, she said she had been violated before, that she hated men, that she wanted to get back at them by writing this expose. I tried to tell her that if she hated men that business was going chew her up and spit her out. I begged ...please try to find another way. She said if I didn't teach her she was going to write a bad review on citysearch. I said, fine, I'm not concerned about that. I want you to understand what you could be getting your self into. We continued to talk for over an hour. She said she didn't want to study with us because I had discouraged her. I said I was sorry, but it was what I believed and if she was really serious that she should contact us and at least we could give her some pointers so that she could get in and out with the least damage possible. And that even if she didn't choose to take classes that if she decided to dance and ever needed a friendly ear that I would be there for her.
So today I see this

So I wrote this
I was so angry at first ...then just crushed. I am trying so hard to do something good. To take a bad experience and do something good with it. Something positive.

I guess you can't please them all. I once had a student write this.

I loved EVERYTHING about the class. I originally signed up for the class as an alternative to working out in the gym, and of course, learn how to move. I loved the idea that the classes would be taught by a former exotic dancer. Hey, learn from a true professional instead of wannabes. Having not worked out in 6 years, I was apprehensive about taking the Desire 1A workshop (I was afraid it would be one of those cold, robotic gym environments). I was proven wrong in so many ways. I was given more than I bargained for, which was fabulous. I had an instructor that worked out/danced with the rest of the students (rather than stand on the side and dictate what to do), the classes were set in a super-relaxed atmosphere, no judgments, individual attention was given to each one us, easy-going pace, and sooooo amazingly fun. I am forever grateful for the fact that the workshop gave me so much more than I asked for. I was able to look in the mirror and not judge myself on how fat I was, how short my legs looked, how my gut was hanging out, etc. I was able to look at myself and feel more feminine, sexy, empowered, and more comfortable with my body. I can never fully describe what this workshop has given me or done for me. I loved every minute. I loved every part. I loved everything. I found my niche workout and place for me and am definitely sticking with StripXpertease. My first stop was Desire 1A workshop. My next stops are Desire 1B and Stripper Strength. -Carrie L. Desire I Series NYC

That's why I do it...I hope that that lady didn't end up going to the club. I have a feeling she didn't , because if she did, she would have understood what I was saying.
Yeah, no, I'm sure of it. So there ya go. Maybe my words worked after all.

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Sunday, January 6, 2008

This is from Craigslist LA. Rants about being a stripper.... Part one

I laughed my ass off when I 1st read this. This is really how the majority of us feel. I do think I have said all of this either out loud or in my head at least once. See my commentary in RED.
Here is part 1.


1) Hey you over there, holding that one dollar bill in your hand with a death grip and waving it around at me like it's the fucking deed to Trump Towers... what the fuck do you want me to do, grow another pussy?? It's a fuckin' dollar, put it down on the tiprail already. **yes, so true. My favorite is when you do a 15-20 second dance on stage for their $1, and they say, is that it? I'm like , uh, is THAT it? There were even the occasionally really drunk guys who actually tried to give you quarters. Don't do this boys. Quarters can leave quite a mark on your face when thrown by an angry stripper.

2) Men that come into the club for a lapdance with NO underwear or boxers and thin-ass, nylon shorts, so we slip and slide on your hard-on (which always feels like a sharpie pen). Ew! I don't even bother dancing with you nasty fucks anymore. ** Oh god, windshorts. Oh hey, you are the first guy who's ever thought of that! Wow. You must really be on to something. Please note that when your hard dick is poking through your wind pants it makes it really easy to aim my ass on it and sit down hard and fast. And whatever you are thinking in your head, trust me, it won't feel good. It will hurt reallll bad, and then you'll still owe me $20.

3) You with the thick-ass jeans--this was an impromptu visit, eh? ** Imagine sandpaper on your ass...it hurts. Hey cowboy, if you need to use a whole can of starch on your jeans, I am gonna have to pour a whole can of beer on your lap to make it pliable.

4) Don't pull my thong up during a dance and ask me if that felt good. It does NOT FEEL GOOD.** Or pull it down. I hated that. Once again you will just end up in pain and still owing me $20.

5) Hey you loser, counting all your bills to me after the dance, all $20 in ones, and rubbing your fingers between each one to make sure you are giving me just that one dollar. Yes, you. *This guy is a loser. Thank you kind sir, thank you so much for your charity.

6) No I will not let you just "slip it in real quick" for 50 more bucks. If you're going to proposition me, at least don't insult my worth. **Yes, men say this. Sometimes they offer more. Also heard, "hey, lemme see it" "can you put it in my mouth?" and my favorite "can I smell it"

7) Stop asking me if my tits are real. There are as real as my affection for you. *Classic, Also heard, "are those yours?"Reply," yep I bought 'em."

8) If you cum in your pants, you have to tip me an extra $100 for being a lame-ass who can cum from just a lapdance. ** Yes, oh yes, this happens too. I like her idea. :)

9) Stop asking me out. You're a smelly, fat loser and the only reason I'm smiling and cooing at you is because I want your money. Outside of the club I wouldn't even fart your way. **Actually keep asking me out, because until you figure it out, you're still gonna give me money.

10) Stop bitching at me about the goddamn two drink minimum. First of all your breath stinks, you have a piece of salami stuck to your goat-tee and you look like Jay Leno. Secondly, I don't give a shit. *Fastest way to get a stripper to leave your table, complain about drink prices. If you can't afford the drink you sure as hell aren't gonna get a dance...see ya!

11) Don't bitch at me about the $8 non-alcoholic beer either. Hide a bottle of Jack in your coat pocket next time like everyone else does. ** I haven't ever seen anyone do this at any club I worked at , but pretty clever.

12) My horniness is in direct proportion to your income. **I think this just about sums it all up.

13) No, you CAN'T SMOKE. Dumb. Ass. **Unfortunately I worked at a club where smoking was allowed. Prior to all the smoking bans.

14) Boys, don't sit in the front row with your homeboys and act all engrossed in some deep conversation (knowing damn well you ain't talking 'bout shit) during a girls performance because you want to look like you're too "cool" to notice the hot, naked girl in front of you. ** Boy, this is so true. This actually also happens during lap dances, and it kills me. I think every girl has given dances where the guy is looking around the room or talking to his friends. Usually suits or thugs. Trying to impress their friends. Easiest $20 for a stripper. I usually take that opportunity to work the room or make stupid faces at the guy I am dancing for.

15) DON'T SIT IN THE FRONT ROW IF YOU ARE NOT GOING TO TIP. Fer chrissakes!!!!!!!!!!! ** This should be a rule. end of story.

16) Dumb ass, don't ask me, "so what do you guys do when you're on your period?" Answer: I lap dance only with guys in dark pants. * I mean what do you think we do? I said I hold up in my house, put on sweat pants, smear chocolate all over my face, eat ho-hos ,and watch ghost over and over again. Isn't that what everyone does?

17) STOP trying to grab my tits!!!!!!!!! That's extra. **Hahaha. It should be extra. But it happens. I am always amused when regular girls are surprised that we get grabbed and touched all night long. They say, "But I thought that there were rules , that they couldn't touch you." Yes, but just like speeding... everyone does it.

18) SHOWER FIRST, you nasty fuck! **YES!!! I also hated when men wore inappropriate work clothes too. You really couldn't change out of your painters overalls before you came in? I mean WTF?

19) If you don't tip me, I'm going to call your wife. * tee hee hee...

20) I had a feeling you weren't going to tip me, so I took extra care to rub my lip gloss on your collar and wear extra glitter lotion before our dance. *Ummm, yeah...we do that. :)

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