....StripXpertease.... The Strip and the Tease.

Sexuality, tips and toys, the good and bad of being a stripper, insight into Kimberly's life, men, StripXpertease info, tales of dancing from the past, and experiences teaching women's striptease and lap dance classes in NY & NJ.
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Thursday, June 28, 2007

How to striptease ...our article. Section D of PART I


Step Three: Bring him to ecstasy by pretending you are in it.

Throughout the dance, your eyes should do three things and only three. One: look directly into his eyes; use the sorcerer move. Look at him like you want him more than a starving man wants bread. Two: keep your eyes closed. Allow him the freedom to explore your body with his own eyes without feeling like you are watching him. This is the ultimate voyeuristic pleasure for him. They love to watch us! Three: watch your own hands as they move across your body (I will cover hand moves in part two.). Whatever you do, never look around the room. Next, make your breathing heavy. Do all the little things your body does right before orgasm. Lick your lips, moan ever so slightly, roll your head back, and open your mouth. Yes!

Now you have lit the candles, shaved further back than you ever thought possible, and you mugged in the mirror so much you can do it in your sleep. You are feeling like Cleopatra in a pearl back thong. But, now the question is, how do I actually dance? How do I move my hips, perform a lap dance, and turn in these heels. Just stay tuned to part two to learn all the movement secrets. But in the meantime, practice what you have learned so far. Purchase your ideal costume, perfect your seductive smile, practice walking in your heels, and work on that mantra. And do not feel guilty if you start to become more excited about the way you feel regarding yourself than the way he is going to feel when you are done with your dance. Like I said, it is okay to be a little selfish.


Stay tuned for PART II !!!!

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Friday, June 1, 2007

How to hide our flaws...aka cellulite


Strip tip:
Its all about the fishnets ladies. They are hot and you can get a pair that is all fishet and just a tiny wait band. Put then on and pullup a thong to cover the waistband for a cellulite zapper with sex appeal. The criss cross pattern will divert the eyes and make your legs look super hot.

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Tuesday, May 1, 2007

All about the angles


Strip-tip:
Always try to keep nice angles. Look in the nirror when you dance...it should be all perfect arched curves and angles. Use your hands on your hips with elbows straight out to frame your chest. And keep legs straight any time you bend forward to make the booty pop. YEAH!

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Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Striptease workout : Stripper Strength


Stripper Strength is a our striptease work-out class!!!

The class is an hour long and uses real stripper moves to tone and strengthen the body. The class flows slowly much like a yoga class, and less like a cardio class. Then we use the moves you learn through out to put together a hot and sensual routine at the end of the class. You will need comfy work-out wear, and heels(bare feet or tennis shoes work as well). The class will be held every Tuesday from 6-7 PM, Wednesday 12:30-1:30 & 9-10PM, and every Sunday from 2-3 PM at Empire Studios located at 127 W. 25th St, 11th Floor (Btwn 6th & 7th Ave). The class will be open to the public, but will be conducted in a private room that does not allow for ANY spectators. The class is open to women only, 18 and up and will taught by Kimberly from StripXpertease. To pay for classes contact Empire Studios @ (212) 645-2441 or just drop in! You can also take a completely private Stripper Strength class, just you and the instructor.

EMPIRE'S CLASS RATES:
Single Group Class (drop-in): $20

World Dance/Dance Fitness Class Cards (buy several classes and get a discount!)(May be applied towards any Belly Dance and Dance Fitness class.)
5 WD/DF Class Card: ($13 per class) - Valid for 2 Months from date of purchase ($65 total)
10 WD/DF Class Card: ($12 per class) - Valid for 3 Months from date of purchase ($120 total)
20 WD/DF Class Card: ($9.95 per class) - Valid for 3 Months from date of purchase ($199 total)

Student Discounts: A 10% discount is offered to students who are actively enrolled in a college or university. Proof of enrollment with valid picture ID required.

Call Empire @ (212) 645-2441 for easy phone registration!
Check out their site http://www.empiredance.com/

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Friday, February 9, 2007

Why take a striptease class?


I was recently asked a few questions and I wanted to share my responses with you. The questions are about why striptease is popular and why women are now flocking to it in masses!!


Why do you think Exotic dance has gained such popularity over the last year?
1. I think exotic dance and striptease has gained popularity year after year. Perhaps this year stands out to some because it is just reaching further across the US. But I think the real reason is that there has been a lot of press coverage on striptease fitness this year. Terri Hatcher raved about Shelia Kelly's S factor (pole fitness) and Oprah featured both of them on several of her shows. Also Carmen Electra's aerobic striptease video was released in 2003 or 2004, so it is just now really getting out into the world. And I think it will continue to grow. However, these "fitness classes" were just an acceptable front to what was really being taught, or sought after anyway. The public wasn't ready for "stripper" classes, but striptease aerobics was a little easier to swallow. However, now that the public is seeing that the trend is here to stay and that everyone from lawyers to Sunday school teachers are taking it, is becoming more acceptable. Now several companies, ours included, are skipping the fitness cover and going straight to the slow and sensual moves which are what women really want to learn. And other companies, just like ours, are using exotic dancers to teach and design their classes, not aerobics instructors. These ladies want to move like the girl at the strip club, not like Jane Fonda..no offense Jane. Because real strippers don't sweat!! The routines and moves are slow, sexy, and very sensual.

Why is exotic dance something that so many woman want to learn?
2. I think women just want to feel wanted, to feel sexy. That is why they come to class, to feel desirable and to awaken that naughty diva inside that society and just plain growing up has stifled. They want to feel OK about using their sexuality. It is a bit of the Cleopatra complex; to be able to use your feminine wiles to have ultimate power. But really it is about self confidence. I think most women with self esteem issues(and we all have our moments) trace this problem back to issues with their bodies, their looks, hence their sexiness. These classes let women use movement to reconnect to this lost sexiness, and big thighs and small breasts are forgotten when they see them selves moving. It is just another baby step in the yet unfinished feminist revolution that started over forty years ago.

Any other comments you might have about what you have seen as far as increased popularity.
3.Popularity is gaining because it is becoming more accepted. But we still have a long way to go. We(StripXpertease) still get denied rental space because of the "type" classes we teach and I still have clients who don't want to tell anyone about their classes. But there are those who do promote us and those clients who want to tell the world, and as long as they keep talking, this trend will continue to grow.

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Tuesday, February 6, 2007

How to perform a striptease ...our article. Section C of PART I


Step two: Harness your confidence, or at least the look of it.

Gentleman’s clubs always advertise a bevy of top notch, Playboy quality beauties for your carnal pleasure. However, the truth is that they are not all Barbie doll babes. They can be extremely short, very tall, sport double Gs, or be flat chested. They can be too thin or quite chunky. I have seen a shaved head dancing next to Portia De Rossi hair. Some wear more makeup than Tammy Faye, and some have never used mascara in their life. But they all make money. So who makes the most? It is not always the prettiest girl with the perfect C cup. It also is not the girl who dances a little closer than she should in the VIP room. Time and time again, the girl who leaves with the fattest wad of bills is the girl who exudes the most confidence through out the night, be it on stage or on the floor. Whether it is a put on or sincere, confidence is a must. At first, for you, it probably will not be genuine. After all, it can be a daunting experience to stand in front of your man and put on a sexy show. It is natural to be nervous, but you must put on an act. Every exotic dancer has something that they feel completely self conscious about, but they fake it and push onward! So, how do you achieve this false confidence when all you can think about is your exposed cellulite, falling in your heels, and whether or not he is going to laugh or cry? Your first step is to practice, practice, practice. I will say it again, it is imperative that everything is this little guide be practiced. Strippers are not born; they are made through 8 hours a night, 4 days a week of on the job training. Trust me, every veteran in the bar can spot a new girl a mile away. Just keep that in the back of your mind.
To achieve the look of confidence, a constant smile is paramount. Not the beauty queen smile, but the, I have a naughty little secret smile. Smile a devious smile like the Elvis grin that made the world week in the knees. Now, tilt your head down slightly, and lift your eyes. You are now in predator mode, and he is most definitely the prey. Mimic the Sahara lion stalking her prey in the tall grass, moving deliberately. You are in control of this show, this ride, this moment. Then you must find your mantra. This is something you will repeat over and over inside your head. It should pull your focus inward and make you feel powerful. Repeat, “He wants me. He is so hot for me, I could just stand here and he would pop a woody.” Sound stuck up? Good! Remember, selfish stripper! By doing this you are oozing confidence and finding your power. Next, look at him and narrow your eyes a la Paris Hilton. Imagine yourself as Medusa or a powerful sorceress, and your gaze is what keeps the spell alive, intact. Practice this face in the mirror. Just like models practice their look in a mirror, so should you, until it becomes easy and natural. Do it while you put on your make up in the morning.

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Monday, February 5, 2007

How to perform a striptease ...our article. Section B of PART I


Step one: Put him in a C.O. M. A.

Since you don’t have the DJ, lights, house mom (lady responsible for hair and makeup in the dressing room), or pole, you will have to improvise and do it yourself. Remember this; you will want to make him beg for more. Hurt him so badly that you leave him in a coma. That is C.O. M. A.

C stands for confidence. Make sure you are feeling very confident on the day of your dance. He might have a reaction that you did not plan on. When faced with something like this from their lovers, men are sometimes overwhelmed. They might be embarrassed or even laugh. I even had a client tell me once that her boyfriend cried because he was so touched. Just make sure that you are confident in your skills, have practiced, and have prepared for anything that might happen. I will discuss confidence in more detail in a moment.

O is for outfit. The key is to wear what makes you feel as sexy and as fabulous as possible. Do not be concerned with what he likes. Your pride and happiness in the way you look will make you more attractive than you would be in something he picked out that makes you feel less than beautiful. Remember, selfish stripper! Go to your local lingerie store, pick out a few outfits, and please try them on to see how they fit. Buy at least two outfits, and wear the one that feels best for your mood on the big day. Nothing makes a stripper feel worse than the wrong outfit. There is a very good reason why dancers have 30 outfits and change constantly. You will also need a thong, or T-back, which is an undie with a one inch thick strip of cloth that covers your rear end. G-strings (undies with just a string to cover the back end) are nice, but I feel that they reveal a little too much before it is time. It is like wrapping a gift in cellophane. If you insist on full bottoms, wear a thong underneath for the final reveal. And yes, you need heels. You would not ride a bicycle without tires and you are not going to do a striptease without heels. My recommendation is six inch stiletto platform open toe shoes with an ankle strap. They will be easy to find online. Your new shoes will need to be broken in. Just wear them around the house in 20 minute intervals until you start to get the hang of it. If they are too tight, heat up the stretchy plastic parts with a hair dryer before slipping them on. They really can be quite comfortable once you adjust to the height. Also do not be afraid to experiment with accessories like belly chains, thigh highs, gloves, garters, and hats. However, all accessories stay on.
M is for music, your background music. It should be loud enough to feel in your body, but it should not over power the show. It can be fast if you want it to be, but slow and heavy songs are always best. No matter how fast the song is you should always move slowly. Also, your song should conjure up emotion. It should make you feel empowered, sexy, or exactly how you imagine you will feel when you ace the dance. I happen to love Into You by Ashanti because the song describes how much she adores the man in front of her and the beat is super sexy. Or for empowerment, Miss Independent by Kelly Clarkson is great and fun to move to. Songs about sex and its joys are always perfect. Darling Nikki by Prince is just plain hot. Load your new hit into your iPod and listen to it like a Tony Robbins tape. Absorb it. You should know every guitar riff, every lyric, every oh and ah. The more that you know your song, the better that you will be able to move to it. The beauty of dancing is that you can move to drums, guitars, even lyrics. As you practice with your song, you will see where you can punch certain moves and accelerate others. Just like the original strippers, or burlesque dancers, moved to the drum beat, so will you.
A is for atmosphere and appearance. These are things we know, but often overlook: kids at grandma’s, phones off, lights dimmed, doors locked, and wine and candles as needed. Also, a little effort on your looks will go a long way. Shave everything (ever heard of a Brazilian wax?), get a pedi/mani, let your hair down, use lots of perfume, put on makeup, and pop a mint. Body oils, shimmery powders, and lip glosses are wonderful beauty tools as well.

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Sunday, February 4, 2007

How to perform a striptease ...our article. Section A of PART I


You go girl, you finally did it! You took a strip cardio class, wore your new Victoria’s Secret bra, sat your lover down, and told him to prepare for your alluring and tantalizing striptease. Except… it didn’t go quite as planned. To work up your courage, you drank one too many glasses of wine. You fell twice. You couldn’t get your damn bra unhooked, and instead of channeling Gypsy Rose Lee or Carmen Electra, you embodied a dancing hybrid of Dame Edna and Elaine from Seinfeld. Bless your heart, you tried. The truth is it is not as easy as strippers make it look. Nevertheless, striptease is a fantastic way to get in touch with your inner diva and show your sweetheart that you aim to please. There is nothing better than a new trick that causes your lover to stare at you with wide eyes and gasp, “Where did you learn that?”

Now more than ever, women are lining up in droves to learn this special way of erotic and powerful control. I know because I myself teach ordinary women how to move like exotic dancers. I have taught all types, sizes, and shapes of women including grandmothers, CEOs, third grade teachers and doctors. I am 29 now, and I spent the majority of my twenties as a topless dancer, dancing my way into the hearts and wallets of men for more years than I care to admit. And I was good. When the guys were not spending money in the bar, the rear dressing room would become full of girls. But I was rarely in the back. Once a fellow dancer walked into the dressing room filled with fed up girls, sat next to me, and said, “Well, if you’re back here, I know there’s no money out there!” I was always raking in the dough. However, I was not the best looking girl in the club. I was muscular with a thick waist, thin hair, and a small B cup. But I had perfected the art of seduction through dance, and until I had become burned out during my last few years, I usually had at least 2-3 guys waiting for a lap dance through out my entire shift.

So why do women want to do this tawdry tango for their partners in the first place? Why not just buy a new sex toy or slip on a cop's outfit for a little role play? There is something powerful about striptease, and it is also something most men fantasize about. Guys do not stand in the street ogling the traffic cop at 23rd and 5th or wait in line at the downtown sex shop when the latest ball tickler or Jenna Jameson video is released. But they will wait in line, pay a twenty dollar cover charge, spend four times the street value for a beer, and drop hundreds to thousands in a single sitting on an exotic dancer. Why? Honestly, it is different for each guy. Usually, it is either the fantasy of the unattainable, the opportunity to get close to a beautiful woman who will show him her boobs, the chance to have the most stunning girls in the room vying for his attention (a.k.a. money), the possibility that he will be able to touch what shouldn’t be touched, the novelty of being in the “titty bar”, or just a chance to hang with the boys and act like cave men (Beer good. Woman good.). The list goes on and on. For most, it is the equivalent of us ladies snagging a win-a-date with our favorite hunky celeb. We know he won’t really be interested, but just maybe. And if he wants to lean over and plant one…well, we wouldn’t mind! It is a one-night fantasy. But the question to ask is, how do I tap into that fantasy? How do I become her?

Here it is, your two part 21st century guide to striptease. Even though it is not as easy as it looks, it can be learned, and most importantly, it can be mastered! The first part of this guide will cover the exterior appearance of an exotic dancer and the initial set up of your own “main stage.” The second part will cover the actual moves to make your honey drool. First things first, you have to stop thinking about how this is going to please him (Or her for all my lovely lesbians out there. And yes, the same rules apply.), and start thinking about how this is going to benefit you, because in the long run, it will. Think of yourself as the self centered, selfish stripper.

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Thursday, February 1, 2007

Yes, we alllll fall down



This could happen to you!

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Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Confidence


Sorry for the delay..I have been sick. And catching up is a bitch!!

Recently a client asked: I would like to know how you got into this- how did you become interested and how did you grow your confidence? You are amazing!

So I thought I would share my reply:

Again, thanks. And I got into dancing as a teenager. I was 18 when I started, and danced waaaay too long. I saw the strip cardio fitness thing explode and felt like women were taking these classes as a means to an end. I felt they really wanted to learn the real moves. I had already retired from dancing and decided to teach it. My confidence in dancing and in teaching came from positive feedback, not only from others but from myself. It was only when I looked in the mirror and told myself that I was hot, sexy, vibrant, that I really felt that way. I alone was the true keeper of my confidence. When I told myself that I was not good enough, ugly, fat, then it was true. We really are in charge. It is up to you to convince yourself and it is always hardest in the beginning. It is still a struggle for me, I won't lie, but it really does lie within... that is why I suggest practicing the predator face in the mirror. Put on your sexiest make-up, hair and outfit and crank the music and rock out to yourself in the mirror. Feels good ! Woo!! And when you hear the voice inside say, gees I look bad, or this isn't right, or i look stupid, tell it to shut the f*ck up! Say to your self, I look amazing, damn I look hot, who wouldn't want this, too bad they can't all look and move like me. I know the first thing is to say is, it feels silly, but keep trying.

xoxo
-Kimberly

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Friday, January 19, 2007

Check out our latest press release about our striptease lessons


Here it is: Press release.
...or read below...

Real Strippers Don’t Sweat! Striptease classes from StripXpertease teach women how to move like the




StripXpertease teaches women the art of exotic dancing without incorporating the “cardio” aspect into their classes. Instructors believe that true striptease is slow and sensual. Classes help women open them selves up to their sexuality and sensuality without shame.



[ClickPress, Fri Dec 29 2006] Striptease classes are spreading like wildfire, and for good reason. These classes allow women to feel risqué and sexy, just like strippers, but without getting a job at their local strip joint. However, the majority of these classes are fitness based and leave women with a toned rear end, but no idea of how to move it to seduce their lovers. Also, most of these classes are taught by instructors who are completely unfamiliar with striptease as it is performed in upscale gentlemen’s clubs, which is slow and sensual, not sweaty.

To top it off, most instruction institutions are still too afraid of crossing the line and offending someone who might not want to see a woman touch her breast with a twinkle in her eye. StripXpertease, on the other hand, is not scared and is offering classes in the art of true striptease in New Jersey, New York, and Texas, in studios and in their client’s homes.

StripXpertease was created by Kimberly Smith, a former exotic dancer with over 8 yrs of dancing under her belt, who wanted to use her time on the pole to help women feel and look sexy without shame by teaching them how to move just like the pros. She created classes that show women how to dominate and seduce their subject, touch their breasts with reckless abandon, and take back control in the bedroom and in their lives with moves that don’t require fancy equipment like poles, which most women do not even own. StripXpertease teaches moves that real women can duplicate without breaking a sweat, using only a chair and a smile.

The instructors at StripXpertease, who are both former exotic dancers, are using their classes to help women break through the shame behind embracing their sensuality. The company is still denied rental space because of the “type” of classes it teaches and still has clients too afraid to let their family and co-workers know of their recent “education.” Kimberly Smith, owner and NY/NJ instructors says, “Until the world says it's OK for women to be sexual and sensual and appreciate their bodies we will continue to hit that glass ceiling with a resounding thud. Sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of! There is nothing wrong with the classes we teach and the message we share, which is that all women have the right to feel sexy without any shame. Our bodies and our sexuality hold a deep and potent power. A power to change our lives for the better.”

A recent client said after taking a Basic Moves class, “I think there are a lot of women out there that would like to have this talent but are too embarrassed or shy to pursue it. The chance to step out of the mother/homemaker/wife role was great! There are times where I just want to put all of that on the back burner and just be that flirty, sexy predator that you were describing....with nothing else in my focus but making my man squirm. I’m thinking all women are strippers at heart – at least somewhere in their being – and that many of us have been conditioned not to recognize or validate that part of ourselves. We don’t talk about it enough…but I think if we would do that more then all of us would have much more confidence and would have better relationships....knowing that we all felt basically the same way.”

StripXpertease has been operation for over 2 yrs, offering empowering striptease class for women ages 18 to 88. They offer extended classes with many levels to choose from. Each class also includes a cheat sheet. Private lessons for individuals and groups allow class to be limited to just the instructor and student or the instructor and students that all know each other. Each class can be taught in studio or in the student’s home if so desired.

Classes are held in New York City and Austin, Texas. Classes can also be available in New Jersey and other areas of Texas. They cater to bachelorette and birthday parties too.

For further information, or to schedule an interview, contact Kimberly Smith at 800. 747.1462 or Kimberly@stripxpertease.com.

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Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Funny pole dancing videos

Another funny video....

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Saturday, January 13, 2007

First pole dance.

Volvic water ad...the first male engineer..sooo true.

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Friday, January 12, 2007

I am too nervous too take a striptease class!!


Oh goodness. I hear this all the time.
I am too fat, too old. I can't dance. I have no rhythm. I have 2 left feet. I don't have boobs. I don't have an ass. I can't move. I can't walk in heels. I am not sexy. I have no experience. I don't have a man to dance for. I don't like my body. Who would be attracted to me dancing?
The list goes on and on. But ladies, listen ....are you listening?
IT DOESN'T MATTER!!!! And it's probably not true. We are so hard on ourselves (my self included), and it limits our potential. There is one thing that trumps all of this and it is confidence. It can make or break you.
So come to the class. That is why we offer private lessons so it is just you and the instructor. We aren't going to laugh at you...I promise. And all women make progress in class. You just have to try. Confidence will come, and sexiness will flow.
If there is something you can do to make a change in your life than do it!

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Thursday, January 11, 2007

More miss and don't miss about the strip club and being a stripper


Things I miss:

FIGHTS!

1.Cat fights, or should I say bitch fights. Man...girls fought hard and often where I worked, well like once every other month. Using shoes and beer bottles, crazzzzy stuff. It always left the room buzzing. I mean, it was horrible, but you couldn't help to get caught up in it and talk about it with every one. I mean some of the girls I worked with had a few screws loose you know, then they would get drunk and mad at each other. Oh, easy entertainment. It is like a car crash, you can't help but look then you tell your friend ..mannnn I saw this really bad wreck!

2.On the same note, chicks flippin' out on customers and fighting with them. I've seen girls straight up punch dudes in the face. Beautiful. Grab my boob, you get warned, do it again, you get knocked the fuck out! I mean some of those guys deserved it.

3. Ok..... I loved watching girls getting so wasted they would start major drama with the managers until it reached the point where they should just stop, but they were so drunk that they couldn't. And then they would get fired. It would be really dramatic with make up smeared and half street clothes half stripper clothes dragging her stuff out the door, as it fell out of her bag ...cussing everyone on the way out. But they would always be back the next day. You see, you never really get fired from a titty bar... I love that. I was never fired by the way.

4.The best was customer fights. Full out bar brawls. Like WWF right up in the club!! The music would stop and the bouncers would come to save the day. I don't know why it was always so exciting, but it was. (I mean they never got too far because of the bouncers.) And I'm not the only one who thought so too. You always felt like you missed out if it went down while you were in the dressing room.

5. And lastly, closing early on a slow night. God bless the early close!


Things I don't miss

1.Smelling like beer and cigarettes.

2.Customers with sticky fingers. I hated when customers stole my outfits. Assholes. What are you going to do, wear it? Actually, I know what you are goign to do...eewww.

3.Guys, who after you dance for a dollar tip on stage for like 15 seconds, say, "Is that it?" Really? A dollar? Is THAT it dude?

4.Guys who wore wind pants....ickkk. Do I need to explain?

5. Girls who steal your makeup. I wanted to get pink eye and leave it all over eyeliner that I never use so that the hoochie who stole it wakes up with crusty eyes.


That reminds me of a story. A girl once asked to borrow my concealer. I said, "Sure!"

She then proceeded to dab my concealer on the pimple on her butt, and then handed it back to me. I was dumbfounded. I just said," Its OK. Keep it." Gross!!!

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Friday, January 5, 2007

Will that damn apple haunt us forever?


Will that damn apple haunt us forever? Are we doomed to forever be shameful of our bodies and our sexuality? Are we forever doomed to keep hitting our heads on that glass ceiling? I sure as hell hope not! But something happened last week that definitely left a large goose egg right above my forehead. And I knew right then and there what to write about. NO SHAME! MORE POWER!

There is a lovely studio I rent from in Austin (one of a few). I absolutely love it! Their prices are reasonable, they have double mirrors, the entire building is the studio so there isn't overlapping music or students, and the woman who runs it is sweet as pie. I LOVE it! Unfortunately, she has to move on to bigger and better things in life (I wish her the best!). The story is, this guy is taking over the lease and all the sub-leasees will just rent from him instead of her. She tells him about StripXpertease in an email and I think, all is good. I email him to rent space and he won't return my message, so I contact him again. He finally calls me back and proceeds to tell me that he cannot rent space to me. I felt my heart rate increase. I try to maintain a polite tone as I ask him why. Although I already knew. Sure enough, it is because of what we teach.

I was shocked! Why, why, why, I say. He goes on to say that the "people" he is in business with are in the "public life", and "well we all know how the media can be." He says the "media" might get hold of it and make it scandalous. Scandalous?!?! I said there is no nudity; we aren't having S-E-X in the studio, what is the problem? He was like a broken record. Everything I said, he gave the same response. Public life, media, blah, blah, blah. I said what is the difference between what we do and salsa, tango. Both equally romantic, exotic. But the record played on. He said he understood, it was just his "partners." Yeah, right. I hung up... defeated.

The question I kept asking was what is the media going to say? Don't they support it? Story after story about pole classes at crunch, and striptease in mainstream. Even OPRAH has featured it on FIVE of her shows. The fact is, it isn't the media, it is people. People afraid of their own sexuality. Their own desires. Their own flesh. Afraid of women running around naked in the streets with red lipstick and our boobs bouncing around thrusting the world into total chaos where societies crumble and Howard Stern becomes a demigod.

The truth is, until the world says it's OK for women to be sexual and sensual and appreciate their bodies we will continue to hit that glass ceiling with a resounding thud. I am disappointed, but not surprised that there are still backwoods men and even women closing their doors to the still struggling feminist revolution. Sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of! There is nothing wrong with the classes we teach and the message we share. That all women have the right to feel sexy without shame.

It is shame that causes problems in the bedroom. So shamed we can't open up and look at each other, try new things and relax and feel the joy of intimacy. It is shame that many religions instill when they preach s-e-x only for reproduction. It is shame that parents instill when they talk about s-e-x with wide eyes and furtive glances. It is shame that makes women withdrawn and cold in the bedroom. Why is that we are either whores or virgins. Why can't we explore and express without being chastised?

I could go on and on about how angry I was, how hurt, how disappointed. But it won't change the fact that that jackhole feels the way he feels. But you don't have to. No matter what you believe, or what you stand by, your body is your own and a blessing to have. There is nothing shameful with exploring it and loving it. We are women and our bodies and our sexuality hold a deep and potent power. A power to change our lives for the better. A power to stand up tall and be proud of our curves, our breasts, and our full lips. Imagine how much more fun we would have if we didn't have to hide the fact that we are taking striptease classes. Imagine how much more fun we would have in the bedroom if we weren't afraid...afraid of trying new things, afraid of what he might think, afraid of what our bodies look like, afraid we won't measure up. Imagine how much fun we would have if we used our sexuality a little more to get what we wanted when we wanted it. Imagine how much more fun we would have if we could walk into a "toy" store and but a vibrator or two with out feeling our cheeks flush. Imagine how much fun we could have if we could tell him no, that is not really how I like it. Imagine how much fun we could have if we could wear that really short mini to work without the boss sending us home. Imagine how much fun we would have if we could share these thoughts with our best friends. Ah, imagine.

"We live in a society where s-e-x is somehow shameful and should not be talked about - but we use s-e-x to sell cars. That is backwards. Human sexuality is a blessed gift to be honored and celebrated not twisted and distorted into something demeaning and shameful....Our creator did not give us sensual and sexual sensations that feel so wonderful just to set us up to fail some perverted, sadistic life test. Any concept of god that includes the belief that the flesh and the Spirit cannot be integrated, that we will be punished for honoring our powerful human desires and needs, is - in my belief - a sadly twisted, distorted, and false concept that is reversed to the Truth of a Loving God-Force." -Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Soul

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Sunday, December 31, 2006

More about the heels you strip in


When you wear them, still point your toes at every opportunity. POINT POINT POINT!!!

And as far as options, you have a lot.
BUT:
Be able to walk in 6 inches before you move to 8 inches. Please. If the cushion of the shoe is black, it will most likely bleed onto your toes, if your feet sweat at all. The sole of the shoe should be rubber, or you will slip around. And if you wear boots, wear thick socks too.

If you find your foot cramping from pointing, try to "work out" your feet more. ex: without shoes, point, and then flex and repeat 50 x's. Then try "drawing" the alphabet with your pointed toes.

If you find your foot slipping through the shoe, you can find cheap shoe pads at payless shoe source and super glue them into the base of the shoe. If you don't glue them in, they will slip around when you point your toe.

And NO, in reality, they aren't like walking on little pillows, but if you wear them and put on a good show, what he does to you afterwards should feel pretty damn close :)

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Thursday, December 28, 2006

Songs to dance to during your striptease dance.


Oh boy, I get this question ALL the time. Honestly it depends on you. When I was dancing, I picked songs that enhanced my mood. If I was happy, they were happy songs. And if I was sad, well, they were sad songs. Most of the time at work you either loved being there or you hated it. Those feelings were directly linked to the amount of money you were making and how quickly you were making it. That was usually what influenced my mood. If I was affected by outside sources, my music reflected that. Anemia by Tool if I hated everything. Hole's Doll Parts when boys, (or usually one particular boy) really ticked me off. I also tried to change my mood. Playing a song that reminded me off good times when I was down...it always seemed to work. However slow and sexy is always best. When you are dancing you will most likely be nervous and will move faster than needed. So pick slow songs to slow you down. StripXpertease has iMixes available on iTunes.


Here are a few of the artists and songs I used to dance to: Jay Z, 2Pac, Lauryn Hill, Regulators by Warren G, Chico deBarge, Korn, Beastie Boys, Foo Fighters, Prince, Madonna, The Verve, Marvin Gaye, Drive by the Cars, Enigma, Dre, Busta, Clapton, Depeche Mode, Poe, the entire Crooklyn soundtrack, old Motown, Ben Folds, Steely Dan, The Police, Local Austin Bands(Scabs, Little Sister, Breedlove), DJ Rap's Fuck with Your Head, 112, Beck, Easy E, Massive Attack, Nate Dogg, Incubus, Joe Cocker, Duran Duran, Sasha, Opus 3, Thievery Corp., Kosheen, Curtis Mayfield, Stevie Wonder, Ozomatli, Jane's Addiction, Smashing Pumpkins, Olive, George Micheal, Orbital, Portis head, Barry White, and A Perfect Circle...just to name a few.

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Things I miss about working as a stripper


I have often been asked what I miss about the business. I can tell you there are a few things, but they are far outweighed by the things I don't miss. But here are few of both.

I miss:

1. The way my make up always smelled like perfume.
2. Free drinks. :)
3. The awesome music. 8 hours of music every night so loud you could feel it in your chest.
4. The routine of getting ready. I hated it then, but now I kinda of miss it. It was like your own mini spa: shave, nails, skin, hair, makeup, etc
5. Dancing on stage and having a chance to express emotion...whether it was a sad song because I was sad or happy one if I was on cloud nine, or the angry songs...that was fun too. Really hitting the beats of the song and knowing you rocked it out. (My favorite!)


I don't miss:

1. The cat fighting over customers...we need to grow up...really.(and yes, I did it too).
2. The negative comments from men, "you are too skinny, too fat, too short, too old, too young...." They could be really cruel. And you heard it every night..every girl hears it.
3. Slooooow nights.
4. Bar food. Every night. Yuck.
5. Sloppy drunk groping gross customers. Stop drinking and don't touch me a**hole! YUCK!

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Wednesday, December 27, 2006

The "Stripper" Smell... what is that perfume?


So.... I recently had a question from a student :
1. I've noticed that at some strip clubs the women have this fantastic smell, and I feel like some of them smell the same, so I was thinking either that could be a perfume, or perhaps an oil of some sort...do you have any idea what I'm talking about? Any recommendations? I really want to make this as realistic as possible for my guy...

Sooooo I wanted to share my answer since this is not the first time I have been asked this particular question.
1. We do have a smell...isn't it funny. Really, its a combo of all of us wearing A LOT of perfume, body spray, scented lotion, and hair products. We bounce around from guy to guy, leaving our scent trail...hahaha. Then everyone ends up smelling the same. The trick is to DOUSE yourself in it. Now, straight up eau de parfum (a lot of dancers use it, but we have cigarettes, booze, and other smells to contend with) will knock your honey out because it will be too strong, but eau de toilette and body sprays will work. Pick a scent you like, douse, and give yourself 20 min. after spray down before you rub on him.
To douse, spray your self (naked) with it like you are applying a self tanner (don't miss a spot). Also get your hands and hair ...and a little extra in the decolletage and crotch. Then do the same thing for your outfit and voila...you are good to go!

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